Southern Seasons Greetings

I like being from the South. I enjoy country music. I can appreciate the alternate English language. And there’s nothing that compares to Southern fried chicken with a kick. And a very intricate part of the South is being laid back, taking it slow. We talk slowly, we walk slowly, we aren’t in any rush. I like that too, most of the time.

Picture a very crowded mall at Christmas, place it in the South. If you haven’t experienced this first hand, you probably think that all crowded shopping malls are frustrating at the holidays. That all malls are filled with people who browse through the items you are wanting to buy, who stand in long lines and can’t find their coupons once they get to the cashier, who stand in the middle of the walkway with their ten relatives trying to decide if they want to go to this store or that or do they want to eat now, who follow that pedestrian to their parking spot even though you are behind them. Ok, sure, but add at least ten minutes to each of these things when you are in the South.

Because browsing is an art form. Because we add about seven extra syllables when we are apologizing to the cashier for holding her up, but we know that “coo-pawn” is in this big bag somewhere. Because, bless his heart, Uncle Bob is just starving, though that store is on the way out? Because, did I mention, we walk soo slowly. Not that I’m in a hurry, but my goodness, when everyone is moving so slowly it’s a bit overwhelming.

Patience has its limits. You have to pass by people. You learn to do so with finesse after twenty years of experience. You learn to park in the obscure parking lot or in the last row, only to avoid the slow moving cars.

The upside though, everybody is polite. If you bump into someone, you definitely hear “excuse me” or “oh, I’m sorry.” That is something that doesn’t happen everywhere. And if you take a few minutes to sit on a bench and watch, that family trying to decide what to do can actually be amusing, when it’s not you that’s navigating around them.

Merry Christmas y’all. Take time to enjoy the things and people you love, slowly.